Anyone have a rock I can crawl under?

This has been my worst day in recent memory. I had a recording session with the Musicians of Saint Clare, the choir with whom I have been to Europe three times. In attempting to record the solo quartet in the Allegri Miserere Mei Deus, I just couldn’t tune right, and the more I got it wrong, the worse it got. I felt so humiliated. I felt better after lunch, and we recorded a few more songs before I was overcome with a feverish pre-syncopal episode and had to lie down for most of the rest of the session. Again, I felt really stupid. This is the 2nd time in 4 months the NCS has taken me down in front of the choir – it must be getting old. “There she goes again!” It’s so embarrassing to me. Fortunately, when the rest of the choir left, our quartet took another stab at the Allegri and this time everything tuned perfectly. The day was saved.

Don’t get me wrong – I do love to be the center of attention, but there are some limits, and musical incompetency and public incapacitation fall well outside those limits. I feel like I came across as a total basketcase today in front of a group of people I love and respect.